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Hindi Non Veg Jokes

Non Veg Jokes

Girl = Main jab bhi apne pados wale ladke ko dekhti hoon, meri bra tight ho jati hai. 

To uski Ma Boli, “Kal se bra hi mat pehen, uski pant tight ho jayegi!!” 😛 😛

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आज से 10 हजार साल बाद जब कंडोम के कुछ अवशेष जमीन के नीचे से मिलेंगे….
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तो उस समय के लोग हमारी सभ्यता का नाममहानचोदडोंरखेंगे  ! 😉

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Do Saheliyon Ne Apna S*x Change Operation Ek Saath Karwane Ka Faisla Kiya.
Operation Ke Waqt Unke Rishtedar Operation Theatre Ke Bahar Chintagrast Ho Kar Intezar Kar Rahe The.
Kuch Ghanton Baad Doctor Bahar Aaya Aur Bola, “Mubarak Ho! Laude Lag Gaye!” 😉 😛

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ek raat bahuu ne kisi gair merd ke saath guzari,

mager saas ne kuch na kaha,

bhala kiun,

kiun ke saas bhi kabi Bahu thiiiiiiii

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4 Dogs f**king Bitch very Hard

Pass 1 aunty khari thi, rone lagi

Bacche ne Pucha:”Kiya hua”

Aunty:”KUCH NAHI BETA JAVANI K DIN YAAD AGAYE” 😛 😉 😉

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1 sardr ne aag bujhane k liye phunk mari to uska PAAD nikal gaya,

Dobara phunk mari Fir se PAAD nikal gaya,

Sardr gusse me gand ghumakar bola

“LE TU BUJHA LE”.

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Sharma ji ki party mein verma ji ke paas Mrs. Sharma aakar boli:
“Bhai sahab aapne to kuchh liya hi nahi” aur yeh keh kar ek chicken ka leg piece uthakar unki plate mein rakh diya.
.
.Party khatm hone par Mr. Sharma ne Verma ji se poochha “Khana kaisa laga”
.Verma ji: “Badhiya, par end mein bhabhi ji ne jo taang utha ke di maza aa gaya.” 😛 😛

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Ek ladki ki bra par likha tha 93.5 RED FM

Socho uski panty par kya likha hoga.
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Bajaate Raho.

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S*x ke baad aurton ke alag alag reaction

Call girl : Chal nikal.

Girl friend : Shaadi kab karoge.

Padosan : Phir kab aaoge.

Biwi : An 3-4 din mat bolna.

Kaamwali Bai : Ab to pagaar badha do saab. 😉

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Girl Friend: Mera rishta aaya hai aur shadi hone wali hy.
Boy Friend: That’s Good,
Phir to hum condom ke bina s*x kar sakenge. :*

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S*x kya hai;
S*x ek kala hai, Jo kare uska bhala
hai
S*x ek bhavna hai, jisko pura kurne
ki sabki kaamna hai
S*x do atmaon kaa milan hai, sadiyo
se jiska chalan hai
S*x maja hai, Jo na kare uska jeevan
ek saza hai
S*x bhakti hai, jisme subki mukti hai
S*x ek jaap hai, jisko na jupna
mahapaap hai
S*x amrut hai, poora jeevan jisse
trupt hai – Dirty S*x

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Paper Dene Or S*x Karne Ke Baad
Sari Girls Ki Feelings Same Hoti
Hai:Kitna Lamba Tha NaKash Thora
Time Or Mil JataTooba Pehle Kitna
Dar Lag Raha ThaPhir To Pata Hi
Nahi Chala Kab Ho GayaUff Teen
Ghante Tak To Meri Saans Hi Band
Ho Gayi ThiAagay Ka To Theek Tha
Peechay Ka Kitna Mushkil Tha Na.

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Paper Dene Or S*x Karne Ke Baad
Sari Girls Ki Feelings Same Hoti
Hai:Kitna Lamba Tha NaKash Thora
Time Or Mil JataTooba Pehle Kitna
Dar Lag Raha ThaPhir To Pata Hi
Nahi Chala Kab Ho GayaUff Teen
Ghante Tak To Meri Saans Hi Band
Ho Gayi ThiAagay Ka To Theek Tha
Peechay Ka Kitna Mushkil Tha Na. 😛 😉 😉

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Teacher: “What Is A Condom?”
.
Aamir Khan Muskurane Lag Jata Hai
.
Teacher: “Aap Itna Muskura Kyu
Rahe Ho?”
.
Aamir: “Sir!, Wo Kya Hai, Bachpan Se
Iccha Thi
Ki Main S*x Education College Mein
Padhu! Aaj

Yaha Padh Raha Hu, Bahut Maza Aa
Raha Hai”
.
Teacher: “Zyada Maza Lene Ki
Zarurat Nahi Hai,
Condom Ki Defination Bolo?”
.
Aamir: “Sir! Condom Is Anything
Which Reduces
Population”
.
Teacher: “Will U Plz Elaborate?”
.
Aamir: “Har Wo Cheez Jo Population
Control
Kare!””
.
Baccha Paida Nahi Karna Hai,
Condom Hai Na”
“Masti! Chahiye Raat Se Lekar Subah
Tak,Condom Hai Sir”
“Actualy Sir! Hum Condom Se Ghire
Hue Hai”
“8th Class Ke Ladke Se Lekar Mujh
Tak, Sab
Condom Ka Use Kar Rahe Hai”
“1 Second Mein In,1 Second Mein
Out, In-Out,
In-Out”
.
Teacher: “Arre… Defination Kya
Hai?”
.
Aamir: “Wo Hi To Bata Raha Hu Sir”
.
Teacher: “Exam Mein Ye Sab
Likhoge?”
.
“Ye Condom Hai! Masti! Raat Se
Lekar Subah
Tak!
Idiot””Anybody Else??”
.
Chattur: “Sir!, Condom Are Between
Any
Combination Of Body So Connected,
That Their
Relative Positions May Be Seen In
Kamasutra.
.
.”Teacher: “Wah! Kya Baat Hai.” 😛

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Pati bola: Good nite,

patni : aise kaise good nite

Band karo light,

hathyar karo tight, lelo nipple ka bite,

karlo pussy se fight,

Aur gira do apna BIRLAWHITE!

Tab hogi good night

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Ek Neta Ji Hospital Ka Survey Karne Gaye
General Ward Mein Dekha Ek Mariz Muthh Maar Raha Tha.
Neta Ji Ne Hairan Hote Hue Doctor Se Puchha: “Ye Kya Hai?”
Doctor Ne Samjhaya: “Is Ka sperm Bahut Tezi Se Banta Hai Hourly Nikalna Jaruri Hai.”
Neta Ji Agle Ward Mein Pahunche
Udhar Ek Nurse Mariz Ka Lund Choos Rahi Thi
Ye Dekh Ke Neta Fir Hairan Hue Aur Doctor Se Puchha: “Ab Ye Kya Hai?”
Doctor: “Bimari Wahi Hai Par Ye Deluxe Ward Hai.. 😛 😉

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Girls hostel mein ladkiyan cycle chala
rahi thi
aur bahut chilla rahi thi.
Madam boli: shor mat karo,
dheere-2 maza lo varna kal cycle
mein seet lagwa dungi. 😉

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Suhagrat ko Husband:
kuch karne ki Ejaazat hai..?
Dulhan shrmate hue: Hamne to kabhi
gairo ko bhi manaa nahi kiya,
Ab aap to fir bhi apne hai.. 😛 😛

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Girl: Baba mera Boyfrnd kab
sudhrega?
Baba: Use layi ho?
Girl: Nahi wo Ghar par hai.
Baba: Ok apni Bra utaro.
Girl: Kyu?
Baba: Uske Hatho ki lakeere dekhni
hai. 😛 😉

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Banta: Ek white colour ka condom
dena.
Shopkeeper: White hi kyun?
Banta: Padosan ka husband guzar
gaya hai, afsos karne jaana hai 😛

 Image Source: Google Images
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